Rrrrrrrrrrrrrolling along

Well, I rocked my presentation for work. I knew I would... it's easy to present when you know the information (and you're on codeine for menstrual cramps). ;)

Amazon.ca finally has some gay parenting/conception books available so I ordered a couple. I can't remember the names... I'll mention 'em again when I receive them.

Julie and I were talking last night before bed about children but I can't quite remember exactly what she said because I had taken a sleeping pill and was kind of groggy. I know she said something about not wanting children when she was growing up but considered it in her last two relationships. She thinks a factor in her marriage breaking up was the fact that she couldn't make a decision on children and her 'ex' wanted children badly. Her ex ended up getting together with Julie's ex girlfriend who had had twins the year before. A ready made family.

I told Julie that I'm concerned about her decision the other day and asked if she felt pressured. She answered honestly and said yes, a little bit, but that she wants a child and knows I'm merely starting to research it - I'm not going to a clinic tomorrow. I'm glad she realizes that - that I'm just gathering information and researching. There is a lot of things to learn and plan for and consider.

I think the first thing we need to work out is where the sperm is going to come from. I rather have an unknown-to-us donor. She rather have a known-to-us donor. We currently don't know any guys who would be willing to donate without involvement in the child's life. I, personally, would love to use our friend Ryan and think we would have a beautiful child, but he wants to be an active daddy. I don't think I could handle that at all. Another option is a guy that Julie worked with at one time who lives in Banff, Alberta. He's willing to be a donor without involvement but I personally think he has too many mental health issues. Last year he turned himself in to the hospital because he was suicidal and acted unbelievably odd and scary when Julie and Ryan visited him in October. I think that his DNA mixed with my DNA (I have depression) would be disastrous.

I see Tim Hortons has begun the Roll Up The Rim To Win promotion again. Ahhh... gotta love March. :) I swear though, I have the worst luck. Or, I'm at least tied with Stacey. At any rate, it should be called Roll Up The Rim To 'Please Try Again'.

Oh yeah, and my mother wants me to come out to my grandmother this year. Gahhhh.... that's going to be a tough one.

I see the spell check is not working again. Fantastic.

Today I'm grateful for:

* Tylenol 3
* Mild weather
* Perspective
* Options