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Sunday, December 23, 2012

I'm ready...

Okay, I'm done with this pregnancy now.  
I'm ready for baby to come out.  
I'm ready to lose the swelling in my legs and feet.  
I'm ready to no longer have a watermelon for a belly.  
I'm ready to be able to put my own socks on in the morning.  
I'm ready to walk like a normal person again.  
I'm ready to be able to put my pants on while standing up.  
I'm ready to actually pee more than 2 tbsp when my bladder feels like it's going to burst.
I'm ready to sleep on my back again.
I'm ready to not have nightly leg cramps.
I'm ready to have better eyesight again.
I'm ready to eat spicy food again.
I'm ready to pack away the bottles of Tums I need within reach at all times.
I'm ready to not have my sciatic nerve pinched at least once per day.  
I'm ready to have more wardrobe (and shoe) choices again.
I'm ready to be able to see the entire front of my body without the aid of a mirror.
I'm ready to not have a baby's head grind into my pelvic floor.
I'm ready to not have what feels like a baby trying to attempt to exit the womb via my belly button.
I'm ready to meet this little person I've been in love with for months now...

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Moved in and exhausted

We're moved in!  For the past two days it has felt like we're house sitting for someone because we can hardly believe how this place is ours.  Thanks to Super Jules, we're about 90% unpacked now so it really feels like a home.

While renting we rarely ever interacted with neighbours.  We are friendly people and will say 'hi' or 'good morning' to people but they tend to ignore the gesture - most likely just renter mentality and the knowledge that eventually everyone moves on so why get overly friendly.  Anyway, with moving into a new neighbourhood of home owners, Jules and I have been looking forward to getting to know at least our immediate neighbours.  Wouldn't you know it, yesterday evening our doorbell rang and there stood one of our next door neighbours with a gorgeous poinsettia arrangement and a very nice welcome card for us.  Yay, good start already.  Today I made some squares and cookies and bought a couple cute Christmas trays and tomorrow we'll go ring the doorbells of our two next door neighbours - the one to say thank you for their kind gesture and the other one (the one we share a wall and driveway with) to introduce ourselves.

Normally going to a 'quick' trip to the grocery store for baking ingredients and the dollar store for trays would take an hour at the most, considering both stores are less than 5 minutes away from where we live.  However, I've officially gotten to the point in this pregnancy where I move like I'm 99 years old.  It seems like I now get a braxton hicks contraction every twenty steps and I waddle like a penguin now that baby girl has dropped to what feels like my thighs.  I can't just grab a basket because carrying weight causes contractions so I have to get a cart.  Then I shuffle around the store for what feels like an eternity while I try to remember what I needed.  I was nearly body checked out of the way by an older woman in the baking aisle because I took too long deciding which brand/size of marshmallows I wanted.  By the time I checked out and waddled to the car I was absolutely exhausted.  I had a short window to get the majority of the baking done  before baby daddy and his partner showed up with dinner and to see the house so I was on my feet a lot more than I should have been today.  I just ache now and wish someone would now ring my doorbell and offer me a massage.  I'd ask Jules to rub my feet but the poor woman is exhausted from all the moving and unpacking.  Maybe I'll just break in the bathtub upstairs instead.  Yeah, that sounds good...

Wednesday, December 12, 2012


I thought I would get lucky and make it through the rest of my pregnancy without getting one of the seasonal colds/flus but unfortunately I caught the horrible head cold Jules was struck down with last week (that she's still getting over).  This nasty bug caused her to miss 3.5 days of work last week and so far this week I've missed 2.5 days of work.  My last day of work is next Thursday so this is totally not the time to be missing work.  On one hand I'm really stressed about missing this time to get in more training time with my back-up-to-be, but on the other hand, this is good practice for him and let's face it, at some point I need to worry about me (and the baby) first and work second.  Hopefully I can get some half decent sleep tonight and I'll make an attempt to go in to work tomorrow to get a few critical things done.

Meanwhile, Jules is continuing to pack last minute things as she gears up for the move to our new house on Friday.  I'm so lucky to have married someone who a) loves to pack, b) loves to move, and c) is fine with me not interfering with a or b.

Yesterday, after spending most of the day in bed, I got up to take a bath only to find the water scalding hot even on the coldest setting.  This had happened to us a month or two ago so I knew what we were in for.  Sure enough, I went down into the basement to find it flooding and the hot water tank spewing water out faster than the tiny drain could get rid of it.  Luckily the stuff we still have down there was stacked in the far corner, the only area of the basement that wasn't covered in water.  Long story short, the landlord sent the same plummer over from the last incident and this time he replaced the faulty heat sensor (last time they just decided to monitor it).  The hot water tank is only three years old so it's a little concerning that the part needed to be replaced already but I guess sometimes things just don't last like they should.  Once the plummer left this morning, I was able to run the dishwasher (yay clean dishes!) and a load of laundry (yay clean pajamas ) AND take a bath all with water warm enough for the tasks.  What a luxury we haven't had since the stupid hot water tank did this the last time.  The things you get used to...

Well, time to lay down again...

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

A bit of an update

I've logged on several times in the past couple of weeks intending to post a new blog entry but then I decide I don't have anything new and/or interesting to update with.  It doesn't feel like much has changed in a month:

  • We're moving into our new home on Dec 14th
  • I feel enormous with my baby belly and puffiness all over my body (especially my calves).
  • The baby has dropped a bit because I can now catch my breath and I don't have heartburn 24/7.  I've been feeling frequent pelvic pressure and at least once a day it feels like someone has kicked me in the crotch and I feel bruised when I walk.
  • I've stopped gaining weight even though I'm starving all the time and feel like I'm eating constantly.
  • Sleep eludes me most nights now.  I fall into a light dream state where I dream all sorts of messed up things (the other night I dreamt I was a murder victim) and then I open my eyes like I was just laying there with them closed for a while.  I usually have to get up for a couple hours in the middle of the night, either to eat or because I just can't stand to lay in bed at that point.  I then go to work exhausted every morning.  I'm really looking forward to starting maternity leave later this month.
  • Jules is really sick right now with a cold and has had to stay home from work for the past two days.  I'm honestly really surprised I haven't picked up the cold yet considering I haven't been exactly quarantining either Jules or myself to avoid it.  I feel really bad for her because she's been doing so much around the house and her work is really busy and she's been leading our home buying endeavour... The absolute last thing she deserves is to feel like this.  I've been doing my best to take care of her the past two days - hopefully some of the remedies I've subjected her to will help (neti pot, Nyquil, soup, smoothies, etc.)

Monday, November 5, 2012

update on life

I haven't really felt like updating for a while.  I'm feeling stressed about work and cranky about the pregnancy lately and haven't really felt like writing about it.  At work I'm trying to train a co-worker for my position but the co-worker hasn't even started training someone for his position and just finally hired someone take over that person's position (if you could follow that).  I feel like the days and weeks are just slipping by and that I'll be handing over the reigns to someone who cannot handle the position.  My last day of work will be December 20th and then I'll have a week of vacation and then I'm officially off on mat leave.  I'm both excited for that time to come and terrified all at the same time.

I really hope that I can make it until the 20th so I don't need to adjust our December budget because if everything works out right, we'll have possession on a house December 14th!  Our offer was accepted and so we're just getting the financing and house inspection done in the next week or so and then we'll be home owners for the first time.  It's a semi-detached home in a nice neighbourhood literally two minutes from where we live now.  It's a nice little starter home for us which we'll probably decide to rent out to people in about five years.  It's about six years old and immaculate inside and comes with all the essential appliances and window blinds/coverings.  It has two bedrooms upstairs, both with en suite bathrooms and walk in closets (one is larger as it is the master bedroom) and one bedroom in the basement.  There is also a bathroom with a shower in the basement and a powder room on the main floor.  It has a single attached garage and a fenced in back yard (fairly decent size considering nobody gets a decent backyard in this province anymore) with a nice deck off the back of the house.

As for the pregnancy, I think it's safe to say I'm ready for it to be over soon.  I definitely don't want the baby to come early so I try not to complain but boy do some of these pregnancy symptoms/annoyances suck.  Feeling like I can barely catch my breath half the time, having surprise reflux up into my mouth at random intervals (bad enough during waking hours but definitely the scariest way to wake up out of a dead sleep ever!), waddling around like I'm the fattest person in the world, painful sciatica on my right side every damn day, and now my second trimester energy has left me and I feel like I need a nap every day.  Nothing like trying to concentrate on getting things tied up at work and feeling like a scatterbrain. :(

On the upside, baby girl is thriving and grooving up a storm.  An ultrasound I had a week and a half ago showed she's in the 50th percentile for growth and all her organs and body parts look great.  The technician showed us that she has hair now as well.  At the ultrasound she was head down but I know she's moved around a lot since then.  Sometimes I catch a feel of her bum or her foot or her arm/shoulder with my hand so who knows how she's positioned now.  

My blood pressure is still awesome as is my urine and I passed my glucose test no problem (despite my new craving for ice cream daily).  So despite feeling miserable these days I guess I can't really complain too much.  I've now gained the 25 lbs that I was given as a guideline for this pregnancy (about a pound a week for a while now) so while I'm a little concerned about gaining more, I'm not going to beat myself up about it.  

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Our baby... now in 3D

Our baby girl this afternoon at 26w1d... As I suspected, she's still got enough room in there to do complete somersaults which she demonstrated twice while we were watching.  Her current likes are her hands, playing with her feet, sucking her thumb, somersaults, intricate twisting moves, sitting on my bladder and burrowing her head up in my ribs.

"Noooo... I'm shy... No photos!"

"Well, okay, I'll stop moving long enough for a picture."

"Hm... If I use mommy's bladder as a springboard, I could probably do a complete backflip..."

"Okay, that's enough.  No more pictures!  I have a nap scheduled."

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

100 Days

According to the ticker at the top, I have approximately 100 days left with this pregnancy.  That seems like a lot of time and yet not that much time.  It depends on the day, I suppose.  Friday to Monday I felt so awesome and got some decent sleep (meaning at least 15 min per side before having to roll on my back to get feeling back in my arms) and then last night and today have been awful pain and nausea-wise.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better.  I finally booked an appointment for a massage so Friday afternoon is going to hopefully be VERY nice.

I was told to go for the gestational diabetic screen test sometime after Thursday.  The form says I need to fast for 3-4 hours before I go do it.  I looked online and some doctors say fast, some don't.  I'm wondering if I should just go first thing in the morning... or is that too much of a fast?  

Saturday we have our 3D ultrasound booked.  So excited to see what the baby looks like.  Hopefully all goes well. :)

I've been absolutely terrible at documenting my growing belly thus far.  Aside from my wedding photos, this is the only belly shot I have and only because someone nagged me to take it.

25 Week Belly Shot

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Random thoughts from the week

On Tuesday I had my first appointment with the OB I was referred to.  I was nervous going in but it turned out to be a really great experience.  He is probably in his late 50's and has a really pleasant accent I can't quite place.  He was so gentle (both in demeanor and with the pelvic exam) and very patient and kind when it came to discussing the pregnancy and what is to come.  His nurse was also very nice and kind.  I left there feeling buoyed by the experience.

The baby appears to be doing well and continues to move and groove throughout the day which I'm finding to be a stress reliever at work.  There's nothing like tuning out a problem at work for a few minutes to focus on the little being moving around inside me, reminding me of the big picture in my life.

I continue to have really bad rib and mid to lower back pain.  Definitely time to book that prenatal massage.  In the meantime baths and my trusty heating pad are my best friends.  I normally hate laying on our couch but today I had a pretty comfortable nap thanks to the added support on the back while laying on my side.  I think I might try that more often.

My feet have grown at least half a size in the past month.  Today was spent buying a comfortable pair of shoes in a larger size that can be slipped on easily (because bending over that far has become nearly impossible now) and have a little bit of room for probable swelling in the next few months.  Hopefully they don't expand anymore than this because comfortable shoes are expensive!

I've been going out and walking several times a week.  I can usually make it all the way to the local Second Cup, health cafe or grocery store before my belly starts tightening up and feeling a bit uncomfortable.  It feels good to move around like that and I find it is helping my body handle the pregnancy better (except for the back pain and heartburn).

We are trying to hold out two more weeks before going for a 3D ultrasound.  I can't wait...

Today my passport expired.  I keep forgetting to go get pictures taken to get the process going on renewal and it isn't like I'm planning on traveling anywhere in the next four months.  Still, it feels weird to now be trapped in the country.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

At 23 Weeks...

Weeks 18 - 21 were by far the best pregnancy weeks so far. I could feel the baby moving by week 18, was finally looking more pregnant and was getting nearly a full night's sleep for the first time in four months.  That continued for a few weeks until sometime last week when the mid to low back pain that had been slowly making itself a presence became a nearly full time nuisance, especially at night while trying to sleep.  I've been experimenting with pillows and wedges and whatnot but have not found a comfortable way to stay sleeping (or at least resting in bed) in between getting up to go to the bathroom at night.

Other irritations that have come on strong in the last week or so are heartburn, sinus congestion and headaches.  I have adjusted my diet to remove anything remotely sweet or spicy.  That is probably my greatest disappointment with this pregnancy - the inability to consume anything with spice.  I LOVE spicy food and I especially miss all the Indian food I used to make but sadly I cannot even use pepper these days without enduring heartburn. This of course doesn't stop me from craving all sorts of wonderful things my body cannot tolerate right now.  It's really unfair how that happens.

My sinus congestion is really annoying and causes me to breathe through my mouth a lot, especially at night.  The headaches are probably partly related to the sinus problem and partly due to hormones, either way I was out of commission most of this weekend with near-migraine quality headaches.  So not fun.

I'm going to look into getting a prenatal massage sometime in the next week or so and hopefully that will help everything a bit.  I've been meaning to book one for a while now but never seem to get around to it because I can't really imagine how comfortable it will be.  I guess I'll eventually find out.

This week I have my first OB appointment, a dentist appointment (now that I can finally sort-of tolerate the taste of mint again) and a long overdue hair appointment to get at least 4 inches trimmed off.  

Work has become crazy busy in the past month as the busy season has begun.  My back-up while I'm off on mat leave is about 5% trained - total fail so far.  It is really hard to find the time to write up standard operating procedures from scratch while dealing with a million other things each day (in between a zillion bathroom breaks of course).  I'm starting to stress a little on this because almost none of my job tasks can be picked up after doing them just once or twice.  My original goal was to have him fully trained by the end of November in case something happened with my pregnancy (bed rest, etc.) but I think we'll be pushing that now. 

Well, my attention is being drawn to the busy mover in my uterus so I'm going to go find Jules so she can feel her daughter performing her nightly gymnastics routine. :)

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Sweet Moment

I've been feeling the baby move around and hiccup for two weeks now which is one of the most amazing things I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing but tonight, for the first time, Jules was able to feel her move and that moment between the three of us was the textbook definition of awesome.

Saturday, August 25, 2012


Sometimes I feel like an alien when I visit my family.  Like I'm from somewhere completely foreign with different beliefs, a different personality and a different outlook on life.

I haven't always felt this way, only since I moved far enough away from them to really take notice.

Jules has always been taken aback by my family and I cannot even count the number of arguments we've had about my family members.  As much as I agree with her on the majority of issues, they still are my family and I am a loyal person so I spend a lot of time feeling guilty and torn.

So, what is it about my family?

  • They swear a ridiculous amount.  Now, I'm not exactly innocent of this myself but my goodness, I don't have to fit it in to every conversation I have.  I'm able to censor myself in social situations and I'm able to have tough discussions without throwing in the f-word several times.  My father and my youngest sister, on the other hand, seem incapable of speaking English without liberal use of various swear words.  My mother is pretty bad too but she does seem to have the ability to censor herself in public.
  • They are loud.  I don't know if it's because there used to be five of us in a small house all trying to be heard but my goodness, I go crazy trying to visit when my youngest sister and mom are trying to tell a story, etc.  And the arguing... oh my goodness, tempers flare very fast in my family.
  • My dad is disrespectful of other cultures and uses derogatory terms.  I cringe when I hear my dad use the word 'retard' or a derogatory name for someone of a different ethnicity from us.  I can see this has rubbed off on my youngest sister, who I think also gets this behaviour from the construction site she works at. :(
  • They feel entitled.  This is, again, my mom and youngest sister as well as my mom's sister.  They work hard at their jobs but they are very lazy at home and complain a lot about what they haven't received or what they think they deserve.  My mom's sister is 57 years old and lives in her parents basement rent free.  She treats my grandparents like they are small children.  The other day she demanded I add her back on as a Facebook friend (I defriended her back in April for a very distasteful comment she made on one of my posts) because she needs to know what's going on with me now that she's going to be a great-aunt.
  • They just don't understand how to think before speaking sometimes.  Especially on Facebook.  This is specifically my youngest sister and my mom's sister as mentioned in the point above.  Re-posting utter garbage with profanity and rude images is just so trashy.  Hijacking someone's post about something is also downright rude, as is making a snide comments that are anything but clever.
There are other things that make me wonder how I share the same DNA as some of them, but I'm too tired (or perhaps disheartened) to list more.  Five or six years ago, I would not have really felt this way because although I tried to avoid my family and stick to myself for the most part, I still did live with some family so I was still 'in it' on a daily or weekly basis.  But now that I've been away from it for years and am in the process of starting a family of my own, I feel a little overwhelmed by what to do once we have the baby.  How do I expose my daughter to this behaviour?  How do I limit her exposure to this without hurting the feelings of my family?  

I really wish Jules' family wasn't all the way across the ocean.  Her parents are such wonderful role models as is the rest of her family.  I wish our daughter could have Jules' parents to visit on a regular basis to know as role models.  

Growing up, I thought my parents were decent (never had curfew, never got grounded, never had to speak to a C on my report card) but it wasn't until I became an adult and now on the verge of motherhood that I realized that what I really ended up with was half-assed parents (see, I can swear too).  I was never taught to say 'please' and 'thank you'.  I learned that on my own as I went through life and now try to teach my family how to do it.  I never had to speak to a poor report card because they never wanted to look at it!  They never wanted to go to a school play and they refused to go to parent/teacher night. I was never asked if I had homework, they just assumed I did it.  My sisters and I never had the structure most kids grow up with.  As an eight year old, my parents just assumed I'd come home for lunch each school day to an empty house and make myself something for lunch.  Never showing me how to make anything, I taught myself how to use the microwave, the stove and the popcorn maker.  I ate a lot of popcorn and microwaved Mr. Noodles for lunch.  I only started a fire on the stove once, I think.

I could honestly go on and on but now I'm even questioning posting this for the five people who read this blog.  Nobody has a perfect family, everyone has family members they wish they could vote off the island, etc.  It's just that sometimes it is harder to take than others, and tonight was one of those times.  And with a new person coming into this family next year, I get worried thinking that it is eventually going to affect/rub off on her too.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

We're having a...

We're having a girl!

I think I knew that all along, in fact I told Jules as soon as we had our positive pregnancy test that the odds were in favour of it being a girl.  We inseminated 4, 3 and 2 days before I ovulated.  The ovulation test had me on the verge for two days that cycle so I was a day later than usual.  Add to that the company that came to visit on the last day I was going to inseminate and there you go... the girl sperm endured and got in there. (I'm picturing the girl sperm in there like a roller derby... elbowing each other out of the way...)

However, when the ultrasound tech told us, we were both stunned.  We both tried to snap out of it to get through the rest of the appointment because the tech was so lovely and excited for us, etc.  When we left, we both looked at each other and said, 'Wow, I didn't realize how much I was hoping we were going to have a boy until we found out we were having a girl.'

I feel guilty about that.  It took a good four hours after the appointment to come to terms with it.  My family has almost no boys born into it.  It is ridiculous how many girls are in our family.  I think without even realizing it we were hoping to buck the trend and finally bring a boy into the family.

After all we've gone through to get to this point and how blessed we've been to not only find a fantastic donor but also have a viable pregnancy on the second try, it seems so foolish of us to have gotten hung up on the sex of the baby for even one second.

So that's it, we're having a baby girl and it's going to be awesome. :)

Monday, August 20, 2012

A week of rest

This morning when I woke up and used the bathroom I was startled to discover I was spotting heavily.  I haven't seen any spotting since I was somewhere around 9 weeks so it was a bit of a shock.  Immediately I started looking up causes which seem to vary depending on the stage of pregnancy.  One of the causes are UTIs which I just finished a week's worth of antibiotics for so I tried to relax a bit but then I started cramping mildly and of course this is all right before I had to leave for work.  I had a lot of 'must do' things that my back-up-in-training doesn't know how to do yet so I sat for a bit and then got in the car and drove to work.  While at work, the spotting wasn't subsiding so I called the doctor for an appointment and then rushed to get as many 'must dos' done as I could before I had to leave.

My doctor is on vacation this week so I saw another doctor in the clinic who, in my opinion, is now the greatest doctor I've ever had the pleasure of seeing.  She was awesome and thorough and funny and put me completely at ease.  It helped that I got to hear the baby's heartbeat as well.  She declared that my cervix is good and closed and that she's 90% sure that the blood is coming out via my urine.  She sent me off for blood work and a more complete urine culture (the basic one at the clinic showed traces of blood) and gave me a note to be off work for the remainder of the week to rest.  She also had one of the nurses move up my Aug 27th ultrasound to tomorrow afternoon just to cover all bases.  She mentioned that what the 'incomplete' ultrasound we had on the 13th showed was all normal and that the placenta is not low on the cervix or anything so that's good.  Hopefully little baby cooperates fully this time around and shows the technician everything she needs to see (including whether or not it's a boy or girl!!).

I'm not sure what I'm going to do with myself for the rest of the week (besides go crazy from boredom) but as long as the baby is okay, I'll force myself to relax and catch up on some bad tv/movies.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

random bits

We had our second ultrasound on Monday but dear little baby decided to sleep in and not be cooperative for us while on screen so they had us re-schedule for the 27th when hopefully little baby will be willing to flip over to show the tech all she needs to see.  

Of course 20 min after we left the appointment, I could feel all sorts of fluttering.  I'll make sure I drink some juice or something before the next appointment.

Some other notables that have me a bit on edge...

  • My doctor says baby is currently measuring bigger than the 'norm'
  • My doctor wants me to gain way more weight in this pregnancy than I thought I was supposed to... yikes
  • My belly won't stop growing!!  When I read that fat storage would be mainly re-routed to the belly, I don't think I really understood that until now.  I have to remind myself multiple times per day that I have a baby in there and I haven't just suddenly ballooned into someone I don't recognize (which might be a slight exaggeration on my part but then again, I've been faced with looking at my wedding pics on Facebook every day this week... that belly is so not me!)
  • Ended up at urgent care at 1 am the morning of my wedding to get a prescription to treat the sudden onset of a UTI.  That was a fun day...

Thursday, August 2, 2012


I'm eating ice cream for dinner tonight.  Do I feel bad about that?  Yes.  Do I feel bad enough about it to stop eating it and go make something nutritional to feed my pregnant self?  No.  Am I surprised by that?  Yes. 

I'm pretty much completely 'morning sickness' free these days but have not regained the taste for about 2/3 of the standard fare I normally enjoy.  I still cannot tolerate many spices which cuts out almost all of the Vegetarian/Indian/Mexican/Thai/big-batch-save-money-type meals I would normally prepare.  I cannot seem to tolerate bringing raw meat into the house to prepare.  I've gone off eggs and toast.  I can tolerate a sandwich as long as it is on a bun and not bread but it has to have spinach and cheese on it to mask the taste of the bun and meat.  I'm seriously at a loss most days as to what to take for lunch and what to prepare for dinner.  The only things I crave are things I shouldn't have (and usually don't eat) - cheeseburgers and fries, chicken wings, spinach salad, kiwi and orange flavoured vitamin water.  Well... I can't have most of those things every day which leaves me to attempt to plan meals that I have no interest in.  In past weeks I've thrown out so much food that went to waste because plan as I might, every evening I'd look at the food and go, 'Nope... not tonight.'  I don't even know what I have been eating... some nights we haven't even had dinner because I can't think of anything I want to eat.  Other nights I get lucky and have an idea like 'hm, maybe fajitas wouldn't be terrible' and jump all over that before the favourable thought goes away.  I'd probably be better at eating something I wasn't craving if Jules picked up the cooking and just made something but she's kind of dropped out of the kitchen since I've been able to tolerate cooking again.

Anyway, I didn't mean to go on about food... I meant to post about our plans for August.

We decided a few weeks ago that we'll get married on the 5 year anniversary of the day we met - August 12th.  It turns out that even planning a low key, six person event is stressful.  Well, I shouldn't complain too much, I pushed most of it onto Jules to handle because honestly, I'd get married via the internet if I could.  Since Jules' family won't be able to attend (as they are over in the U.K./Germany), I told my family they couldn't either.  Instead, it'll be our donor marrying us, with his partner and two of our other friends as witnesses.  We're doing the ceremony and a nice dinner afterward at a posh hotel downtown.  We haven't decided if we'll get a hotel room for the evening or just go home afterward.  We have the next day booked off from work so we could but we have a 10:30 am ultrasound appointment to come back home to the next morning.

So yes, get married one day, hopefully find out the sex of our baby the next.  Crazy...

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Ramble of the hell that was this week

It is hot here this weekend.  Not Eastern Canada/US super hot (thank god) but way too hot for this pregnant Albertan.
The hot weather is going to last about a week and a half before cooling back down to the low-mid 20's. This is when I miss the temp controlled condo apartment we moved from last fall. We currently have a small AC unit in the bedroom but it doesn't reach anywhere beyond that. Thankfully Jules has become a master at hanging blackout curtains and having fans circulating air in other rooms so it's not a too horrible 27 C on the main floor.

Our weekend has been filled with garage saling (Jules and her co-worker) and shopping for odds and ends needed around the home. Jules rocked the sales in the neighbourhood and picked up a stroller, a playpen, and a high chair, all in fantastic condition. She also got a couple more toys, a bottle/nipple sterilizer thing for the microwave and some more 0-6m baby clothing (a lady gave her a whole blue bag full of stuff for $5). A wonderful co-worker of Jules is lending us a crib and a rocking chair and another one of her co-workers is giving us some kind of swing. So we're close to having everything we need furniture-wise. I think the only thing we might really need for furniture is a change table for the baby's room (or a dresser high enough to use as one). I think we might ask a set of grandparents for help on that item.

The other items we need such as more clothing, receiving blankets, cloths, misc. baby care stuff can wait until months from now. I think one of Jules' co-workers is also giving us a ton of cloth diapers as well so depending on how those look or how many there are we may need to supplement. Regardless, I don't want to deal with those things now. Honestly, if it weren't for Jules getting into gear on this, nothing would be purchased/gathered yet. I would probably wait until near the end of the second trimester when I felt even more secure that little bean was going to stick with us for the long haul. Then again, if we waited that long, I wouldn't have the benefit of looking over at the things we have now and feeling a little excited like this is actually real.

Why is that so important to feel excited about this right now?

Oh my god... This has been THE WORST WEEK OF PREGNANCY YET.

Thankfully today I'm back to how I felt at the end of June, still slightly nauseated most of the time but able to eat small meals of certain food but when I woke up last Sunday, I wanted to die the morning sickness was so bad. On Monday I woke up not too bad so we had a small outing to a lake an hour outside of the city but by that night I was in the bathroom most of the night and my system decided to evacuate everything repeatedly in every fashion (sorry if TMI...). The next morning was HELL because I was told to drink a litre of water before the ultrasound. Drinking more than a sip of water on an achy stomach was torture. The ultrasound itself was quite painful on my aching abdomen and full bladder but it was worth it to see the little bean jumping around.

I managed to eat half a breakfast sandwich from Tim Hortons after the ultrasound and felt not too bad when I went to work at 11 am. Then at noon Jules' co-worker called me to say Jules was in severe pain and needed to go to the hospital. I rushed over to her work and saw her rolling on the floor writhing in pain, her body so sweaty her hair was soaking wet. She kept yelling out in pain as she clutched her abdomen. I asked them to call for an ambulance and thankfully they arrived 10-15 min later and started looking after her. I rode in the front of the ambulance as we went to the hospital and it sounded like she was getting the crap beat out of her in the back the way she kept yelling and moaning in pain. I should mention that Jules has a high pain tolerance so this was quite scary. They had started giving her morphine before we had left her place of work but it took several more doses before she could settle down enough to not be yelling out in pain.

Fast forward about five hours, more drugs and several tests later, she was released feeling fine and we went home (much thanks to my mom for driving an hour round trip to pick us up in the pouring rain). She had an ultrasound on Thursday and the doctor says they cannot figure out what was wrong with her. We had thought it might be gallstones but they couldn't find any of those. Oh well, she's fine now but damn that day was scary!

So, I think it was the fear of Jules being rushed to hospital that kept my sickness in check that day because on Wednesday I woke up super sick and threw up twice before work. I tried to be brave and stick it out at work but by 10 am I had to call Jules to pick me up and take me home. Oh my god, Wednesday was one of the worst days of my life. I think the only worse day I've ever had is Christmas Eve 2006 when my then girlfriend and I got Norovirus. But it was pretty much the same thing that happened... again, TMI... but there's nothing like rushing into the bathroom and picking up the waste basket on the way. By that evening I was gingerly sipping on pedialyte and nibbling on soda crackers crying my eyes out because I felt so miserable. I stayed home in bed the next day because although I was finally not running to the bathroom anymore, I was weak and exhausted and my middle was so sore from heaving/cramping.

Finally on Friday I was able to put in a solid day at work. I was still nibbling on soda crackers and drinking Gatorade and feeling like utter garbage but I was alive! Since then each day has been better and today I'm actually eating some vegetables. In the past couple months I haven't been able to eat vegetables too often so when I do, I tend to look down at my abdomen and say, 'And this is what vegetables are, baby'. Today I was able to keep my prenatal vitamin down so that was another small victory. I've given up on feeling bad about not being able to keep my vitamins down most days. After this week, I consider a successful day being able to stay hydrated and eating at least something without vomiting everything up.

Hey, on the upside, I didn't gain any weight in the first trimester. To think I was worried about that when I first found out I was pregnant...

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Now it's worth it

So, last night as I was throwing up for the fourth time before bed, I was thinking, 'I better see a #%^*ing heartbeat tomorrow!'

And we did!!

It was absolutely amazing to see the little bean in there kicking and hiccuping and back flipping around.  Jules saw more than I did but as soon as the technician turned the screen towards me, he or she threw up a hand like, 'Sup, moms...

So, now when I'm sitting here feeling icky I can look at this picture and remember seeing all the movement and I feel I can maybe get through it a little better. :)

Monday, July 2, 2012

This weekend's highlights:

  • Checked out garage sales on Saturday - Picked up a dozen onesies/sleepers, a baby carrier and some toys for $20
  • Told my grandparents I'm pregnant on Saturday.  I expect the entire family on my mother's side knew the moment my grandmother got home. :)
  • Subdued Canada Day on the account of horrible morning sickness.
  • Visited a lake in Alberta an hour outside of the city this afternoon and waded in the WARM water.  Turns out there are lots of lakes in Alberta.  I really need to get out more...
First ultrasound tomorrow... hopefully there's a heartbeat!  It would definitely make the lingering morning sickness and general ickyness worth while!

Monday, June 11, 2012

Now 50-75% improved!

Since Thursday I've been feeling gradually better to the point where I feel about 50-75% better, depending on the time of day.  The light at the end of the tunnel perhaps?  I sure hope so!  I've been hoping so much that I'd start feeling better before Wednesday when I fly to Philly for a week-long visit with some friends I've missed a lot and haven't been able to see for nearly five years.  If this keeps up (and hopefully improves), I'll be able to actually eat regular meals without much trouble.  Hooray!

I still have my aversions (the smell of coffee, hand sanitizer, mint are among the top) and nausea but I also have an appetite that will suddenly come out of nowhere once or twice a day.  Since those are the moments I feel the best, I've been jumping (or sometimes persuading Jules) to find whatever it is I'm craving or in the mood for.  There have been a few evening trips to the grocery store in the past few days.  Best of all, vegetables have started tasting good again.  Thank goodness!

I had my second prenatal appointment today and the doctor lectured me on not getting too down on myself for not being able to eat or drink properly right now.  "Women have had healthy babies without eating vegetables or drinking tons of water!"  and I know she's right.  Women have done a lot of things and had healthy babies so I should probably not be hard on myself.  I'm able to keep my prenatal vitamin down again so that makes me feel a little better.  If I get my fluids right now by drinking iced tea and 7-up, so be it.  If a breakfast sandwich at a fast food place settles my stomach for hours, oh well.  I'll bide my time until I can tolerate more things and cook again and I'll get back on the healthy path.  As an overweight woman, I should only gain a specific amount of weight during this pregnancy and I'm just scared of getting off track.  However, having lost weight so far and having my doctor tell me to relax, perhaps I should not be so worried about it just yet.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Added note on the 'morning' sickness/nausea...

I think part of the reason why this has really bothered me is I usually don't get queasy at ANYTHING and my sense of smell is average if anything so normally nothing phases me.  I can eat a meal while watching a surgery on television.  When I was younger, if one of my sister's vomited on the bathroom floor, my mom would look at me pleadingly and offer me $20 to clean it up and I jumped right up and did it no problem.  Sure, I'll have the odd upset stomach or once a year have a killer hangover but none of that was enough to prepare me for the past month and a half.  It's kind of freaky to feel a way in which you've never experienced before.  I know I probably sound stupid for saying that because, duh, I went and got myself pregnant.  How could I not expect these things to happen?  Well, you can imagine how something is when you're planning for it and reading books and the internet but it's a whole other things to actually have it happen.  It's given me a greater appreciation for a lot of people, let me tell you.  You really don't know how something is until you actually experience it.

On a happy note, there were two brief windows in time today where I was actually hungry for food.  The first was shortly after getting up this morning (I was suddenly craving a breakfast sandwich from Tim Hortons) which caused me to rush poor Jules out the door so we could get there before work.  The second was 30 min before a big meeting this afternoon.  I rushed out and got a veggie sub from Subway.  How exciting!!  I got to eat two meals today!!  I sincerely hope there are more days like this to come in the near future! 

Monday, June 4, 2012

Oh my god, I've found three things that I can consume without feeling nauseated or throwing up!

1.  Apple Juice - I can actually drink an entire glass or two with no ill effects.  It is AMAZING!!!  Compared to water (which must be practically ice it has to be so cold to not want to gag on it) or gingerale (a few sips at best) or anything else.  Hallelujah!!!  I'm not going to die of dehydration. 

2.  Popcorn - This is the ONLY food I can eat more than a nibble without wanting to hurl.  Both movie theatre popcorn and microwave popcorn seem to do the trick.  We went to see Snow While and the Huntsman on Friday night and I decided to try a small popcorn.  We were only 15 min into the movie when I turned to Jules and said, "Uh oh, I'm almost out of popcorn." to which Jules gave me a 'please-oh-please-don't-make-me-go-get-you-more' look.  I took pity on her because we were there because she wanted to see the movie (only the third one she's actually wanted to see in the five years I've known her) so I sat there with the pleasant memory of actually enjoying food for the first time in over a month.

3.  Flintstone vitamins - I'm not proud of this one.  It's hard to feel good about being pregnant and taking children's vitamins but oh my god, it's better than nothing.  I've been throwing up my prenatal vitamin (among other things) on a daily basis, despite trying different times of the day, etc.  It's just not working for me.  When I go to the doctor next week I'll be bringing it up.

I'm finding the first trimester to be very frustrating.  24/7 nausea aside, I'm so sick of not being able to eat the healthy things I need to be eating.  I *hate* nibbling on soda crackers and ginger biscuits and all these bland, gross things that I normally never have in my cupboards.  My fridge is filled with apple sauce, banana flavoured soy dessert, vanilla greek yogurt and carrot sticks, eggs and shredded cheese.  I'm so sick of those things but they are the only things I can consistantly nibble on and keep down (mostly).  The freezer is filled with frozen fruit chunks that I occasionally mix with rice milk for a smoothie (my favourite thing ever) but even that doesn't taste like it used to so I end up passing it off to Jules to finish.

Smells are like the kick while already down.  Coffee, mint, garlic, tomato sauce, meat, scented body washes, shampoo and conditioner, nail polish, perfume.... FUCK!

Fortunately I have the best partner in the entire world helping me along with this miserable trimester.  She's been doing all of the chores that involve the offending scents (anything to do with the kitchen, laundry, bathroom, etc.) and being unbelievably patient when I have one of my hormonal moments.

Sunday, May 20, 2012


Would it be too much to ask to have a long weekend every week from now until the end of summer? An extra day to nap and lay around figure out how to deal with this pregnancy... I'd gladly take it!

In addition to my constant sickness (now mostly dulled down to a general feeling of motion sickness with the help of the Diclectin) I now have a new pregnancy symptom that everyone (except me) was waiting for - hormonal explosions.  I'm normally very level headed and have the ability to think before speaking but I've begun to lose the grip on my temper.  Poor Jules has been witness to a few meltdowns already this week, not to mention I now have a few co-workers muttering 'I hope this doesn't last all nine months...' when leaving my office.  I can't help myself, I feel like a volcano erupting when someone asks me 'What's wrong with you?' or 'What's your problem?' and then I feel frustrated because I suppose I brought this on myself.  After all, I'm the one who wanted to get pregnant.  I should have expected this.  I shouldn't be complaining!  So I keep it in and then explode when asked.  Sigh... 

In other, but related news, we had the donor and his partner over yesterday evening to tell them the news.  The donor was a bit blown away by it but excited and his partner was over the moon.  Since I rather burn our apartment down than cook, we walked the short distance to a Thai restaurant to eat and that thankfully turned out alright (they had very good ventilation so the smells we not overwhelming for me) and then came back to our place for some cake and ice cream.  

This morning we Skyped with Jules' parents in England (they are on board with being grandparents - yay!) and then have basically had a cycle of vegging, eating and napping.  Jules has almost finished setting up the venting of the air conditioner we bought out the bedroom window (all of our windows are crank out so she's been working on getting the rest of the window blocked out while venting the air conditioner).  This evening we're settling in to watching a new ep of Sherlock and ice cream.  Bryer's Vanilla... mmmmm....

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


So, after days of barely being able to tolerate eating anything due to my ever increasing every-moment-of-the-day-and-night sickness, my doctor prescribed me Diclectin today.  Now granted it is slow-release but three hours after taking my first dose I can start to feel a change for the better. I still have absolutely no desire for food but for the moment I have a nice break from feeling like I'm going to hurl at any second.  Hopefully it kicks in more and I can start feeling a little more normal. :)

Friday, May 11, 2012

As long as we have our health!

I'm passing time at Toyota waiting for my car to be ready (either a sensor is wonky or I have a super slow tire leak) so I decided to blog. Yay apps that make that possible.

Jules successfully had her ovarian cyst removal surgery yesterday. Things went relatively smooth for the most part. We had a scare after she had her IV put in. Within five minutes she got super hot and soaked through her gown. She got double vision and started retching non-stop. The resident doctor was called in and checked her out and within 15 minutes she was fine again. Strange and scary! After that she was fine and got through the surgery no problem. The nursing staff was so awesome there; we really like that hospital.

She had three hurdles to get past before they would discharge her - eat a muffin, drink water and apple juice and urinate. The first two were no problem and eventually Jules talked me into getting her coffee (twice) from Tim Hortons all the way at the other side of the hospital. The third, oh boy... At the threat of a catheter, she finally managed to go a tiny bit though we both agree today that she should have just let them do it. So, after eight hours at the hospital we finally got home and situated Jules on the couch where she's been ever since.

I stopped to get us some Thai soup we love for dinner and all was well for a while. I should have known it was going to be bad when I was eating and felt a little off. I guess I wasn't enjoying it as much as I usually do. I had walked a ton during the day and was feeling pretty worn out so I figured I was just blah in general. Within an hour though the heartburn started (it is a pretty mild soup) and an hour after that I was really feeling queasy. I decided to go to bed after making sure Jules was comfortable and drugged up appropriately. I don't know what I was thinking though because laying down (even kinda propped up) made the nausea even worse. I was debating getting up to try throwing up but I must have eventually drifted off enough to get passed it. I woke up every so often and felt sick a few times but would eat a cracker or two from a bag I put on my night table and would eventually roll over and fall back asleep.

Today I've been fine except for the small glass of skim milk I almost gagged on. I had a cheese sandwich that went down fine so I'll just keep track of the things that have started offending me and steer clear for a while. My list so far:

*Any kind of tomato based sauce
*My liquid B complex vitamin
*Coffee (I had been drinking decaf since January so I'm sad it has made the list already)
*Ground beef
*The Thai soup
*Bell peppers

As for any cravings, I think I actually do have two. Soup and bananas. I rarely ever have soup for a meal, maybe once a month. Since last weekend I've wanted broth based soup every day. I think this is going to drive Jules nuts because she's not a big soup person at all. As for the bananas, they aren't usually in my top ten fruit list but that seems to have changed this week. I can honestly say I've savored a banana now. I never would have believed that a week ago...

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

5 weeks

The doctor's office contacted me this morning letting me know that my HCG levels tripled in 72 hours so that's reassuring.  I booked a prenatal appointment for next Tuesday.  They told me it'll be an hour with the nurse and 20 minutes with the doctor.  Holy cow, that's a long appointment.  They'll probably want to know some kind of medical history regarding the donor's side and I'm not entirely sure I remember everything the donor has told me (because like an idiot, I didn't write any of it down) so that kind of ruins our plan to tell the donor and his partner next Saturday when they come over to see our new place.  Nothing like Facebook messaging news like this... "So, I'm pregnant... Can you give me the details of your family medical history again?"

As for other people, I've only told my boss (I wasn't expecting to tell her so soon but a development at work prompted me to act) and a close co-worker.  Jules has told a few people in her circle as well as her parents.  I'm not sure if her parents have responded to the news yet or not.  I'm not really keen on telling anyone else until there's at least a heartbeat.

I stopped spotting a couple days ago and I no longer feel like my period is imminent.  I do, however, feel exhausted nearly every minute of the day and my appetite is almost completely suppressed (what a nice change!), not to mention my breasts are extremely tender (no more bounding down the stairs!).  Yesterday we went to visit my sister at her first apartment and I couldn't help myself, I had to lay on the couch almost the entire time we were there and fight the urge to fall asleep.  This morning I almost fell asleep in a meeting at work.  Crazy...

Well, off to eat dinner that Jules made and enjoy her last evening of normal mobility for a week or so as she has her surgery bright and early tomorrow morning.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

I think the test I took today looks darker than yesterday's which is promising. As I mentioned in my post yesterday, last month I had absolutely nothing show up in the test line area on the dollar store tests so it would appear we're doing better this time around even though I feel the same as last month - I'm spotting daily with on and off minor cramping and feel the pressure like I'm going to start my period any moment:

I still have a standing order for a blood test so after Jules went for her pre-surgery doctor's appointment yesterday we both went to get blood drawn. Jules has her surgery on the 10th to remove two grapefruit sized 'things' on her ovaries. We have to be at the hospital for 6 am (ugh!). It's going to be interesting being the one not going in for surgery for once.

This weekend we're taking it easy and laying low, mainly because Jules is super stressed from her job (heavy emphasis on the 'super' - my poor girl) and I have a cold and feel like garbage. We're trying to get our money's worth out of our cable subscription by watching a ton of movies in between naps.

Friday, May 4, 2012

13 DPO

Faint line on the dollar store pregnancy test. Last month I didn't have anything register on one of the cheap tests...

We'll see...

Sunday, April 15, 2012

The new place

I decided to steal some pictures off of Jules' Facebook to show what our new place looks like because I still haven't gotten around to taking pictures.

Front of the 'building' (four condos in one building - the ones on the 'end' are actually in the back as you can see from our far set front door beside our garage.  The ones in the middle are at the front over the garages and are therefore taller)

View of the kitchen from the living room.  Just to the right is a tiny glimpse of the foyer (where the front door, garage door and 1/2 bath is)

View of part of the kitchen and part of the living room...

View of the living room from the kitchen.  To the left of the bookcase is where the stairs to the basement are.

View of the living room from the bottom of the stairs leading to the second level.

The foyer.  The far door is the front door and the near door is to the garage.  To the left is the 1/2 bath and coat closet.  The artwork are paintings of Jules.

The patio :)

The bedroom.  With another of Jules' awesome paintings. :)

Another angle in the bedroom.  A sliding door to the bathroom.  There is a little walk-in closet on the wall behind the camerawoman. :)

And lastly the spare bedroom...

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Try #2 is a go this month now that my latest blood test shows the pregnancy hormone is now low enough. We'll get more of our money out of the Clearblue fertility monitor this month because I'm not too sure on my days this time around.

I'm sitting here trying to concentrate on this post but I keep getting distracted by this cheesy disaster movie Jules is watching here in the living room. It's called Collision Earth and what basically happens is the Sun sends out some kind of magnetic surge that hits Mercury (while a manned spaceship is orbiting it, mind you) and it causes Mercury to go out of orbit and head straight for Earth. Jules loves these kinds of movies and we decided they usually feature the following:

1. Luke Perry usually stars in them
2. Astronauts get unrealistically close to the sun
3. The 'last 5 minutes' on Earth lasts about 45 minutes
4. Nobody has power or cell phone service except the hero of the movie
5. Saving the world is the best fixer of marriages and/or estrangement from children
6. The hero usually has an algorithm/plan/project that was previously rejected by everyone working in the applicable science to which the disaster is related to.
7. When driving a vehicle, the hero is unrealistically lucky in avoiding asteroids/fire/explosions/sink holes/lava/downed electrical lines
8. Suspension of disbelief is usually possible for 2/3 of the movie until such time as something small that doesn't even relate to the major plot line causes you to yell something like, "Oh, come ON... Like he'd find an abandoned car with the keys in the ignition on a deserted road." Never mind the fact that Mercury is hurtling toward the Earth so fast it only takes something like two hours...

I'm sure there are more I could write but I think I'm going to go curl up on the couch and finish watching this fine cinematic masterpiece with my girl. :)

Friday, April 6, 2012

Not so great Friday

More intense cramping started yesterday afternoon and by this morning I started getting menstrual cramps and bleeding typical of the first day of my period. Oh well...

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

15 DPO

Still spotting with mild cramping off and on but after a night of crazy dreams involving pregnancy tests and several trips to the bathroom in the night, I decided to test this morning...

Monday, April 2, 2012

14 DPO and still spotting/cramping but no AF yet. I decided not to test today as we already have a lot going on.

MOVING DAY!!!! Woooohoooo!!!

Jules was wonderful today, directing the movers and starting the process of sorting things out. It is unbelievable how much stuff we had crammed into the storage unit we had rented even AFTER we had pared down a considerable amount.

As you can kind of see from the pic, the kitchen looks like it threw up...

Saturday, March 31, 2012

DPO 10 - 12 have involved spotting and cramping.  The spotting is normal before AF but the cramping is not.  I think I'm just going to wait until Monday and see what happens.  It's hard though... You tell yourself to relax and wait but then you feel like breaking down and testing.

I should have enough things to distract me from testing tomorrow though... We get the keys to our new place tomorrow so we'll be moving car loads of stuff we kept here at my parents' place all day and then on Monday Jules will be directing the movers to retrieve our stuff from storage.  She's taken the week off from work to get everything moved in and sorted out.  I'll be staying out of her way Monday - Wednesday (because I dislike moving and she loves it) and then I'm taking Thursday - Sunday off to enjoy the new place.

Tonight we're taking my parents out to a fantastic Greek restaurant in the city as a token of thanks for letting us live here for minimal rent for four months.  I'm not entirely sure they've ever had Greek food but Jules and I love going there for special occasions (we were last there for Valentine's Day).  We like getting what's equivalent to a taster's menu for around $75/couple and sit and enjoy the atmosphere - sitting under tiny lights and greenery woven around trellis watching/taking part in the belly dancing, taking in ouzo shots (although not this time), plate breaking and great music.  Either my parents will love it or hate it. :) 

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Hm... DPO 9 and day two of unbelievably sore breasts, mild nausea and dizziness and being more tired than usual.  Either PMS has started a couple days early for me or I'm pregnant.  Negative on the First Response test but that doesn't necessarily mean anything.  I'll wait until the weekend and test again...

Saturday, March 24, 2012

One week until we move into our new place. We both cannot wait for April 1st. There are so many reasons why:
  • Woken up early in the morning on a Saturday by loud hip-hop music from upstairs (sister)
  • Woken up by the dog banging the dog door about ten times in his attempt to get through it, also upstairs
  • The vegetable side dish always come in a can and the usual side dish is Rice-a-Roni (which is really good but SO fattening).  I consistently blow my budget each week buying Jules and I healthy food to eat.  Basically I've spent more money here than when we lived on our own.
  • The fridge and freezer are so small I cannot make batches of healthy food to store for later days.
  • My youngest sister is an immature spoiled brat who cannot talk at a normal level but must shout everything she says
  • My parents and youngest sister swear like sailors and fly off the handle at everything.  The sad thing is, is I grew up thinking it was normal to flip out at my family like we were having a normal conversation.
  • My dad uses derogatory terms for a lot of people and it is hard listening to it in the evenings
  • No control over the thermostat so we're hotter than we want to be most nights
  • Laundry is hard to do because people leave their clothes in the washer and dryer for days on end.  There have been several weekends where I ended up doing double the laundry just to get ours done.
  • Everything ends up covered in dog and cat hair.  I've gone through two sticky rollers in the past four months.  I guess it's different when its your own pet... I used to have two and not be bothered by it.  Then again, I used to wear light colours and now I wear a lot of black and grey and brown...
  • Noise, noise and more noise... Whether it be from multiple televisions, music playing, people talking/shouting, the phone ringing A LOT... ugh... 

For the past three weeks, Jules and I have been spending time at the library on weekends reading, drinking coffee at the little cafe and just escaping for a few hours.  Once I finish the two loads of laundry I have started (I saw the washer and dryer empty and I HAD to act!) we will head over there and chill.

In other news, it's one more week until I can test for pregnancy. :)

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Hi, it's the middle of March... take down your Christmas decorations!

I was out walking my parents' dog this evening and I decided to detour down a block I usually walk right by. It was like the block time forgot or something. FOUR houses on this block were still decked out in Christmas decorations. I'm not just talking about lighting (some people keep 'em up on the roof all year around and I don't blame them although the icicle lighting doesn't exactly look great in July) I'm talking about full size santas and reindeer and metal Christmas trees and candy canes on the lawn. It's the 13th of March for crying out loud! We don't have a ton of snow this year! It's not like this stuff is buried under three feet of snow or something! It's like one of the neighbours looked out the window and said, 'Well, if Bob isn't taking down his stuff, I guess I don't have to either.'


In other news... Official Try #1 (because we're not counting the practice run as a real try) is happening later this week (Thursday - Sunday) and we're counting down the days until we move in to our new rental condo (April 1st). Looking forward to our own space again!!

Here's a bad pic of the 'back' of the new rental condo (I took this picture from the parking lot of another apartment complex).  It's kind of confusing... each building has four units and there are two in the front that are above the garages and then two in the back that have basements (like ours).  So ours is on the left and is the lower portion (so the lower left six windows - bedroom, bathroom, second bedroom, kitchen, patio doors, living room).  In the front there is a one car garage.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Punished by the Pope?

I had no idea there was a blogger app... Trying it out now and hoping it doesn't make me log in again (it has twice now in five minutes)...

Recently the Pope spoke out on alternate means of conception and how if people can't get pregnant the usual way (between a husband and wife having sexual intercourse) then they shouldn't try alternate measures.

I joked to Jules last night as I was enduring day two of The Worst Period Of My Life that God was punishing me for trying to conceive a child in an alternative manner. Seriously though, almost two whole days of brutal cramps and nausea so bad I threw up my vitamins in the morning. Sometimes I hate being a woman...

Official try(s) #1 later next week. This cycle's peak days are on the most inconvenient days schedule-wise but we're hoping to do four consecutive days. Two of the days I'm going to have to leave work early in order to meet up with the donor (his schedule is busy too) in a small window of free time. The other two days are the weekend but I have first aid re-certification 9-5 (three years goes by so fast) so we'll be meeting up in the evenings. That reminds me, I need to budget more for gas now that we're needing to drive 45 min to and from these 'tries'. :/

Alright, I've had enough of one finger typing on the tiny iPhone keypad... Time for bed.

Thursday, March 1, 2012


After not getting sick for nearly two years, my immune system has been totally flattened twice so far this year.  At the end of January I came down with a virus that started with laryngitis, morphed to a head cold and then had a nasty intestinal finish that had me off work for a week.  It was brutal. Now I've come down with a cold and I'm absolutely miserable while I wait and see if I'm for sure not pregnant.  I'd kill for some cold medication right about now... sigh.

Watching Grey's Anatomy right now... getting annoyed with Altman and her getting Yang to repeat what happened to Henry in the OR over and over again.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Practice and other things

So, today we had two significant appointments.  The first was to Jules' doctor to find out more about what's going on around her ovaries.  I suppose I should back up a moment and fill in some of this story.  Basically, she's had what she thought was a running injury since last August.  An X-Ray, bone density scan and physical therapy did and/or showed nothing helpful so at the end of January she had an MRI for her left hip.  When the doctor called her in for the results, she started with 'Well, there's nothing abnormal showing in your hip area, but you have a tennis ball sized mass on your left ovary.'  Okay, talk about being stunned.  So, on Tuesday she went for an ultrasound and then went in to see the doctor this afternoon to find out the results.  The ultrasound showed a grapefruit sized dermoid cyst on her right ovary as well.  Lovely.  So, aside from causing her discomfort, they shouldn't be life threatening or anything but regardless, we're a little nervous about it.  She's being referred to a specialist and will require surgery to remove them.  There's never anything wrong with her so this will be her first surgery.  After being by my side for four of them in the past five years (one to repair my shattered nose/sinus after being hit in the face with a puck at a hockey game and three on my index finger) this will be a change.

So, once we left that appointment, we headed over to our wonderful sperm donor's place to take part in a 'practice run'.  All in all, it went very well with only minimal embarrassment on the part of the donor and Jules in regards to the sperm exchange.  I'm really glad we did a practice run because we will have everything perfectly arranged for next month when we really get into trying on my most fertile dates.  There's still a chance I can get pregnant from this practice run (his sperm motility test was well above average after all) but I'm definitely not holding my breath.  If it happens, it happens.  I'll wait to hold my breath next month. :)

Monday, February 20, 2012


It feels like forever since we started the journey toward trying for a child.  For most of the way, it was an abstract plan with several missing pieces and almost as many backward steps as forward.  Let it never be said that a gay couple does not want a child they are blessed with.  The amount of preparation and stress and planning and planning and planning... Well, I suppose it does no good to feel a little bitter toward hetro couples who can just try as they please.

On Friday we are doing what we are all calling a 'practice run'.  By 'we all' I mean myself, Jules, known donor and known donor's partner.  This practice run was going to be done in the small window in which I am fertile but sadly my body decided to have the shortest cycle in nearly two years so by Friday the chance the practice run could turn into a pregnancy is nearly impossible.  This practice run will serve the purpose of easing us into the whole awkward process of handing off the goods and hanging around whilst ensuring it gets where it needs to be.  Four gay people in a house performing what could potentially be a miracle.  It's pretty funny to think about once I get past all the nervous thoughts.

Next month will be full-fledged trying.

Holy fuck... We are actually at this stage.