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Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Sigh...

Why is it that when my personal life is going great, my work life is absolute shit??? I don't get it...

Friday, August 24, 2007

A snapshot, if you will...

It's nearly 5 am and I'm up with horrible cramps. I've taken a Tylenol 3 but that was just over an hour ago and the fucking codeine doesn't seem to be taking the edge off at all. I hate being a woman during this time. Ugh...

I need to catch up but I'm not sure I have the energy. I'll give it a go anyway because I've missed posting on a near daily basis.

Needless to say, I'm dating the British girl and it's going fantastically. Yesterday, she sent me flowers at work. The whole office was practically going nuts trying to figure out who 'J' was...heh. She sent me lilies because we had recently watched Imagine Me & You and I have a huge crush on Lena Heady... so incredibly sweet, especially on a rough day at work.

We had an outing to Ikea and Old Navy yesterday evening. I picked up another pair of jeans (I adore the other ones I purchased last week) and a pair of pyjama bottoms because mine are all way too big for me to wear anymore. She made me laugh because when I opened the door to show her how the jeans looked, she came into the dressing room, closed the door and kissed me senseless before promptly leaving the room saying, "Yeah, they look great, sis. I'm going to go get mom..."

At Ikea we were mattress testing (Ikea has a big 20% off sale on right now) before picking up a couple of clocks (for my work) and some kitchen stuff (for her kitchen). Before we knew it, it was 9 pm and we were starving, so we went to Swiss Chalet where there was this family there with three kids under the age of 8... all of them drinking pop and eating dessert, wired for sound and running all over the place shrieking. I could not believe the parents who just sat there and ignored the whole thing. How do you ply your children with sugar at that time of night, never mind control them in a restaurant? My goodness... it was almost like watching one of those nanny shows.

Despite it being after 10 pm when we arrived back at her place, she convinced me to drive over a few blocks to the provincial museum grounds as she wanted to show me something. My goodness... the view on the grounds is stunning... right on the high edge of the North Saskatchewan river bank, the South side of the city was spread out beneath us in a twinkle of orange and yellow lights. It was raining lightly so the sky was soft and misty... it was very beautiful. I will definitely need to return to that area and take a picture when it's clearer...

I've now popped a second Tylenol 3. This one better work, dammit... work is going to be brutal enough as it is. Fiscal month end always blows because I have to stay 12+ hrs on a Friday night. Add excruciating cramps to the mix and I want to freakin' die...

I purchased a crazy book called The Straight Girl's Guide To Sleeping With Chicks off of Amazon last week. It was one of the suggestions that came up after I added Bound to my checkout bin. I read the introduction online and laughed out loud a few times so I thought it'd be a funny read, despite my not being straight. So far it's definitely lived up to the expectation... and really, let's face it, you haven't learned anything until you've seen published pictures of barbie dolls in compromising positions.

I see that the sun is coming up now and I really hope that either my cramps have subsided to a more manageable level by the time I need to leave for work in an hour or that time simply stops and I can sleep for eight hours. Something tells me neither will happen...

This weekend will be when my parents and sisters (if they're around) meet the British girl. I find myself oddly nervous because I never know which side my family will show... but I'm sure it'll all go alright. Hopefully.

I think I will go back to flipping through Maclean's magazine... I certainly did not know that Michael Buble and Emily Blunt have been dating for nearly two years. Wow. Interesting pair. Michael is on tour right now with Jann Arden opening for him. I would love to see that concert. I think the magazine said the tour was stopping in Canada in the winter...

Today I'm grateful for:

* Drugs. God, what would I do without codeine...
* Friends who still love me even though I've been sucked into the 'new relationship' vortex
* Unexpected surprises
* My co-workers who know I'm gay (all two of them) who diffused the guessing game at work when the flowers came. Bless them...
* The wonderful girl I've met who has already shown me many things I realize I've been missing in past relationships all my life.
* My parents and sisters already knowing that I'm gay so that bringing a girl around is not a big deal...

Monday, August 20, 2007

Check in

I realize I've missed a few days and need to post about the third date but I need to catch up on my sleep before doing so.

I have such a headache...ugh.

Personal life is good. Work is absolute hell.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Second date

Yeah... okay, I guess I know that there's something there. : )

Midway through the afternoon we decided to go stroll through an art gallery after work. We ended up going to the fringe festival after that and then went back to her place for tea (heh..) where we continued to talk past midnight. I just can't get over how much fun it is to have such interesting and intelligent conversation with her. We would probably still be talking away if we didn't have to work in...oh, 5.5 hours. Sigh... damn work getting in the way of my social life.

She asked if she could see me tomorrow (or rather today now..) but I told her probably not because I have my Aunt and cousin's family coming for a barbeque... and seeing how I blew off my Aunt this evening (my mom covered for me... talk about a supportive mother! Willing to cover for me while I go on a date!). We will see each other on Saturday after I'm finished work though. : )

Oh, we also stopped at a bookstore earlier in the evening. It was a new used bookstore near the festival that she wanted to check out. She used to manage a Chapters in the city and is a huge book whore (as well as a writer, etc). I was in awe of the collection she has at home. Anyway, she purchased three books to read and insisted that I pick one out for myself so that I would have a book to remember her by. Kind of sweet, seeing how I adore books.

When we arrived at her place, I noticed one of those tiny little miniture books on her coffee table... I picked it up and it was Nancy Drew's Survival Guide. LMAO... it is such a cute little clever book. She said she found it for me because we have been joking about Nancy Drew a lot lately (I admitted that I had owned several of the books as a kid). So yeah, she sure knows how to woo me, lol.

Oh, I also found out she loves Veronica Mars as much as I do. My god, how much more could we have in common???

Today I'm grateful for:

* Wonderful conversation
* Living in the 'Festival City'
* Friends
* Unexpected visits from family I actually like

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Mid-Week Blah

This week is sucking. I feel like I'm in the twilight zone. Between the hour or two I'm sleeping per night (last night 1.5 hours) and the craziness at work, not to mention the added thought of what may or may not happen in regards to the British girl.... gah! I'm just hanging on for dear life and hoping each day brings me closer to stability.

I really don't know what's going to happen with the British girl. I have no idea. I don't know if we're just friends or if we are going to date casually. On one hand I'm wondering about it and on the other hand I'm too exhausted to deal with it.

My aunt from the Toronto area is in town for the rest of the week, which is a pleasant surprise because she's my favourite extended family member. She called me at work and left me a goofy voice mail message asking if I wanted to get together with her tonight... so we ended up watching my cousin's kid play football for a while and then stopped at Tim Horton's for coffee (water for me... god knows I don't need caffeine near bedtime with the trouble I've been having with sleep!). I think I'll hang out with her a bit after work tomorrow and then on Friday she and my cousin's family are coming over for a barbeque.

Busy, busy...

Today I'm grateful for:

* Moving on
* Exceptionally awesome colleagues in the East
* Only having one meeting tomorrow
* Finally having at least half of this week over with
* My after work nap

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Whatever

I love Rick Mercer. He's freakin' hilarious...

I just got home from work. I worked from 7 am to 8 pm. Woo. Nothing like a good ol' healthy crisis to stir things up... sheesh.

Mr. Bean is not funny to me. I keep seeing the promo for Mr. Bean's Holiday or whatever it's called and it makes me shake my head and turn the channel. It's like Borat... I just don't get it.

I slept from 8 pm to 6 am yesterday. I was nearly late for work because I slept so late. It was great though... pain free sleep at last! I hope I can repeat the same tonight.

The British girl e-mailed me this afternoon to tell me that the lesbian bar in the city is having some event on Saturday, sponsored by the Pride Centre. She wants to volunteer for decorating duty on Saturday afternoon and asked if I would like to join her. It was funny though because she was sensitive to the fact that I'm not out at work, so the whole e-mail was coded with phrases like 'girl family place' and we could meet 'new family', etc. I told her I'm working on Saturday but I'll see if I can escape by 3 pm. It's going to be a looooooooooooong day. I don't even know what the event is at the lesbian bar. I should look that up. She said if we don't find ourselves enjoying ourselves that we can cut out and go see The Invasion. I have to admit that it's nice to have someone other than myself plan an evening. I told her that on Sunday when we were ordering dinner... well, not specifically that, but I said that I like when a girl can make a decision once and a while. I'm a Planner and make heavy decisions all day long at work so sometimes I like to take a back seat when I leave work.

Well, I think it's time to take a short walk around the neighbourhood and then head off to bed. I can't believe tomorrow is only Wednesday...

Today I'm grateful for:

* Red Bull
* Great meds
* My iPod
* Working through big problems
* Sleep!
* Jen actually coming MSN to chat
* Funny e-mails

Monday, August 13, 2007

Exhausted

I am so, so, sooooooo tired. I think I got a grand total of 15 minutes of sleep last night. I was in rough shape all day today. Naturally work had to kick my arse anyway, but today was especially hard to get through while sleep deprived and in pain. I just can't sleep at all. I was in the hot tub outside at 2:30 in the morning in an attempt to make myself more comfortable/tired, but it didn't really work. I went to the doctor after work for a follow up visit for that medication that made me totally ill (probably why I'm not sleeping so well now and feel sick to my stomach most of the day). She prescribed me something to help with my stomach and assured me that it's Tylenol I should be taking for pain and not Advil or Aspirin. I probably could have looked that up online, but honestly, the thought never occurred to me.

My ex had her surgery today. I wonder how it went...

My youngest sister has once again started a new job. This makes approximately 482 this year. We're so proud of her... *rolls eyes*

Today I'm grateful for:

* The end of the work day today
* Meds to heal my stomach (hopefully)
* The fact that I didn't crash my car on the way home from the doctor

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Spontaneous meeting!

So, I've had quite the crazy day...

I had company over last night until nearly 1 am and then I got online and replied to an e-mail from this girl I've been e-mailing back and forth with. The e-mail turned into about three pages and I could hardly see straight by the time I was finished composing it at about 2:30 in the morning. I went to bed and had a really lousy sleep until about 8 am when I got out of bed only because I felt like garbage (despite not even drinking the previous night) from staying up so late. I ate breakfast and read the newspaper before deciding that my burning eyes needed more rest. I tried going back to sleep but found I just couldn't get comfortable. I got up once again and paced the house, tried to read, surfed the 'net, soaked in the hot tub outside... finally I was able to lay back down to sleep. I woke up about four hours later and decided that I should probably get out of bed despite wanting to sleep more... so I dragged myself into the bathroom to prepare a bath (I felt too tired to stand in the shower... that's how exhausted I felt). While it was running, I went online to check my e-mail. There was an e-mail from this woman, titled 'How impulsive do you feel today?'. It started with, "How spontaneous do you feel today? I was thinking rather than gather up two weeks of wondering, why don't we just meet up later - even around ummm, 3:30 or 4 today..."

Yeah, it was 2:55 pm at that time. Needless to say, I took the fastest shower in the history of the world, half-assed blow-dried my hair and gave her a call (she provided her cell number in the e-mail) to let her know I was up for the meeting. I met her in the city near her neighbourhood at Second Cup (a coffee shop chain like Starbucks) where we chatted for about an hour before deciding to walk to a nearby park that had this really great stream and pond in the middle of it where we talked for another hour. We decided we were hungry so we went to a restaurant to eat where we talked for another two hours. We decided to pack it in around 8:30 pm because we both have to work tomorrow. She gave me a hug and told me we will definitely have to get together again this week. She asked me if I'd like to see The Invasion this weekend (she has a thing for Nicole Kidman) with her and I told her I would.

Yeah. So... I really like her. I had an absolute blast. The way we bantered back and forth, you'd think we were in an episode of Gilmore Girls, only better. We have so much in common, it's kind of scary actually. She has such a fantastic personality and she's funny as hell with a sharp wit. Oh, and there's also the adorable British accent. I forgot to mention that.

Here's the part that will make you go, "Um....."

She's married.

Yep. Married. To a woman. Well... they are separated and will be getting a divorce. It turns out her wife fell in love with her ex-girlfriend (the woman she originally moved to Canada for) and they are now together. She's totally fine with it and has moved on and gotten her own apartment. It's like an episode of The L-Word or something. They're all great friends.

Random points of interest:

* She loves Jann Arden as much as I do
* She loves CSI and BtVS as much as I do
* Her former job in London was working for Princess Diana's sister
* She has an odd love of disaster movies
* She's had several articles published in various magazines
* She has reddish blonde hair and she's slightly shorter than I am (so roughly 5'1" or 5'2")
* She's been in Canada since 1999
* She's 35 years old (I'm sure y'all already guessed that though from my previous 'Age Rule' post)

Alright, I'm exhausted. Time to pack it in for the day. Funny, yesterday was the one year anniversary of my meeting my ex. A day later, I have another first date. Strange how that happened. Wonderfully surprising, but strange all the same...

I don't think I need to add the gratitude part today. : )

Now let's hope I didn't just jinx the hell out of this...

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Oh yuck...

In case anyone didn't know this, I have to tell you that skim milk and red grapes should not be consumed together. Bleah... why I thought that was a good idea, I'll never know.

I went to Old Navy this afternoon to pick up a pair of jeans because my other pairs are falling off of me. What a freakin' nightmare. I'm never going to Old Navy on a Saturday afternoon ever again. After Old Navy I decided I hadn't stressed myself out enough so I went to the Nike store to look for socks for running. I found a really nice long sleeved shirt that I liked designed to wick the sweat away from you, etc., so I took that and two pairs of socks up to the counter. The guy at the counter is like, "Um... we're only accepting cash today. Our system crashed." I looked at him and said, "Well, seeing as how this overpriced shirt and these extremely overpriced socks would already run me well over $50, I'd have to say no... I don't have that kind of cash on me." I dropped the stuff on the counter and left. I went to Sport Chek and picked up two pairs of socks for about $25. Good exercise stuff is fucking expensive!!! They know people will pay $10 for a pair of socks that will eliminate blisters from forming on long runs/walks. Bastards.

I went over to my grandparents' place a while ago to check on my kitties. Nobody is there this week, so they're by themselves. They were both in hiding and only one came out to see me. Where the other one is hiding, I'll never know. I don't understand how cats can hide so well. There was one time that Simon (my five year old orange cat) hid and we searched literally every freakin' crook and cranny in that house and we couldn't find him. A few hours later, he strolls into the kitchen looking for food. What the hell? It's not like they go outside or anything... I don't get it. Another time Molly (my five year old calico cat) did the same thing only for longer and my grandmother was in tears thinking she was gone because I had had people in to clean the furnace that morning and the door was slightly open for that time. The sound of them cleaning scared the crap out of the cats and they went into hiding. Well holy cow... when Molly came out of hiding several hours later, my grandmother was sobbing and scolding her at the same time. Needless to say, she loves those cats as though they were her children.

I spent all day at work yesterday composing lengthy e-mails that hurt my brain. So, what do I do all yesterday evening and this morning? Yep, I composed no less than nine lengthy e-mails. Those ones were much more fun than the work ones. No number crunching and stress involved. : )

Oh yeah, I thought I'd mention... a year ago today, I met my ex for the first time in person. Strange how the anniversary doesn't bother me. Two months ago I was sure I'd be a wreck on this date, but obviously I've come a long way. : )

Today I'm grateful for:

* Humour and wit
* Girls
* A half decent internet connection
* My grandmother in B.C. surviving another year

Friday, August 10, 2007

If it weren't for the curse...

Oh boy, I think I may be in trouble.... I really like this one.

No details yet! No jinxing! This will be hard...

The Age Rule

Hm... how does that age rule go again for dating?

Half your age + 7 is the minimum dating age for you... heh.

I wonder what the maximum is? I guess doing the age thing on them and see if you fall before or after the minimum age...

Let's see... 35 divided by 2 is 17.5 + 7 is 24.5.... Oh yeah, I'm well within that.

Just checkin'..

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Wicked, Wrong, Warped Wednesday

My goodness, I am never taking a day off from work ever again. It's just not freakin' worth it! I arrived at work for 7 am and was immediately informed that I had a conference call in fifteen minutes regarding a project that was thrust upon us so quickly that my head is still spinning from it. Well, let me just say that it *is* possible to be stressed out to the maximum degree by 8 am. It didn't let up from there; it was a constant battle today. I did manage to demolish one pile of stuff I had leftover from Friday, so that's progress I suppose. I did get a good laugh from a colleague in Eastern Canada later in the day who shares some of the same struggles that I do. It's always fun when even the most professional people crack a little... heh.

I walked just over 6 miles today. I walked 2 miles before work and then walked to Blockbuster and back in the rain this evening. I returned Freedom Writers which I had watched last night. I thought it was an awesome movie. Even my father couldn't walk away from it. And it was sooooooooo creepy because the woman who plays Umbridge in the latest Harry Potter movie is in it playing a similar character! My dad and I would go, "Ughhhhhh.... she's creeping me out again!!" whenever she was in a scene.

My sister told me that my ex text messaged her today saying she's scared about her surgery on Monday. She told my sister not to tell me. Um... okay, she has to know she'll tell me. I wonder what the purpose of all of that was. I know she'd never admit anything like that to me because it'd imply that she needs someone. To admit it to my sister and then tell her not to tell me... um... yeah. My best friend thinks I should reach out to her again. I told her no. I've reached out too many times already.

I had more to say today but this has already taken me an hour to type because I keep spacing out (and messaging some girl from the city on MSN...), so I'm just going to wrap it up.

Today I'm grateful for:

* Being able to do up that last snap button on my lab coats at work! Woooohoooo!
* My rain coat being loose on me now. Wow...
* My friends
* Perking up after getting a little down about not getting a message from that girl I was interested in. See? Jinxed it by giving a little info...
* Jen for reasons too numerous to explain

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Going Private

I think the time has come to make this blog private. I have no idea who actually reads this blog, but if you still want to read it once I make it private, let me know.

Monday, August 6, 2007

One day left

Okay, so... yeah... I don't want my holiday to end. I think this is the first time in a hell of a long time that I've enjoyed a long weekend. I'm soooooooooooo glad that I decided to not cancel my day off tomorrow. I'm loving this break. One more day of sleeping in... yay...

Today I harassed Jen while she was at work for a while, took a break to go see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix in the theatre again and then came back to harass her some more before heading out for another rollerblading session. Afterwards I had dinner and watched two more episodes of the second season of Lost and then went for a 3 mile walk. Now I'm absolutely exhausted and think I'm going to make some popcorn and watch
Freedom Writers.

I really wish that girl I like on the one personals site would quit camping and message me back...

Today I'm grateful for:

* Causing tea to be consumed up nostrils...heh...
* Days off
* Girls
* My other Philly gal coming online today. Poor Dr. Wendi...working so hard...
* Nice weather again
* Spellcheck
* Updated blogs

Sunday, August 5, 2007

A few of my favourite things...

I don't know why the heck I have songs from The Sound Of Music in my head. I haven't seen that movie in years! I think I may have to rent it sometime this week now, so I can get it out of my system. First I'll have to watch Freedom Writers and the first four episodes of the second season of Lost that I rented this afternoon. I watched one episode so far and I realized it was the one episode I watched on TV... and that's what made me decide not to keep watching it, lol. So yeah, I've been told that I won't like the second season but I'll love the third. I guess we'll see about that...

I am freakin' addicted to exercising. Well, not crazy addicted like some of those people in the gym who live for it and look kind of freakish, but I do enjoy it a lot. It's like drinking water... the more you drink, the more you want it. I absolutely love the fact that I can briskly walk 3+ miles without slowing down or stopping or being out of breath. I honestly wonder if I've ever been in this kind of shape in my whole life.

This evening I went for a 5 mile walk (5.21 miles to be exact) in the light rain. It was awesome. Afterwards I stretched, took a shower and then sat in the hot tub for 20 minutes. Now I'm all sleepy and relaxed. : )

Today I'm grateful for:

* Friends
* Fitness
* The Comedy Network
* Girls
* Hot tubs
* My iPod
* Two more mornings of sleeping in
* My chiropractor
* Zone bars at Costco
* My job
* Angel Food Cake...mmmmm....
* Unexpected compliments
* Willpower
* A healthy imagination
* My Philly Jen for finally coming online this week
* My Ohio Jen (aka my American twin) for updating her blog without my even asking her to... holy cow! I'm shocked! ; )

Saturday, August 4, 2007

More progress!

I think it's official...

I am over my ex-girlfriend

Yeah... I'm not sure if that scares me or makes me happy. It was hell for two months but I let myself feel it all... and I think I've received my reward now. I've let go. Actually, I think I did a couple of weeks ago but didn't entirely realize it. Perhaps my new adventures on the personals sites have sped up the recovery time, but really, who cares... the point is, I'm done with it.

My test for this... I looked at pictures this morning. I didn't get sad.

Anyway, I'm missing my TV a lot lately. I feel stupid for wanting to purchase a new TV when there are two other TVs in the house. It's just that none of them are in my bedroom so I can lay in bed watching something before I go to sleep. Of course several studies show that watching TV in the bedroom causes a person to not sleep as well. I have to wonder though, would a person get more sleep if they lay in bed and fall asleep to the TV or if they sit out on the couch watching TV?

It's pouring rain today. It's kind of a nice change. I didn't go golfing, obviously... I went and saw The Bourne Ultimatum instead. I liked it but it didn't answer all of my questions. I really hope they make another one.

My sister is such a loser. She's sitting right beside me on another laptop singing really badly. Maybe I should go tell her everything that happens at the end of HP7... that'll shut her up...heh.

Today I'm grateful for:

* Lazy days
* A new friend
* Things to laugh about/at/with
* Being out to my immediate family
* Julia Stiles looking kick-ass on the big screen

Friday, August 3, 2007

Long Weekend

I went to bed last night at 8:30 pm and didn't wake up until nearly 9 am. I so needed it. I went into work at 11 am and finished at 4:30 pm. So far I haven't done much and think I'll end up going to bed early. I'm still quite tired. This week has been exhausting to say the least.

I bought some roller blades the other day. My goal for this weekend is to not break any bones in my body.

I want to see some movies this weekend as well. I'd like to see the Harry Potter OOTP movie again as well as The Bourne Ultimatum.

Today I'm grateful for:

* The end of the work week
* My uncle no longer in pain
* Rain forecasted for tomorrow morning so I don't have to get up at 5:30 am to go golfing
* Less back/pelvic pain today

Thursday, August 2, 2007

Sadness

My uncle passed away this morning. :(

I really hope none of my work colleagues were on that bridge in Minneapolis yesterday... man, that's such a tragedy. Those poor people...